Brayden and I went to a play date today at my good friend Paula's house with Miss Rosalie and Benjamin, two of Brayden's best friends. Benjamin and Rosalie are closer in age to eachother, and Brayden is almost a year older than both of them, so watching them all play is interesting. Today, Benjamin pushed Rosalie down a few times, and Rosalie began to cry each time. After one of Benjamin's time outs today Brayden says to Rosalie "Im sorry Benjamin hit you Rosalie, I make you happy now-I make Benjamin happy now too!" I thought it was sweet that Brayden recognized the interaction between Rosalie and Benjamin, and that he was trying to play peace maker in the situation.
On our way home Brayden was chatting with me about his day, which is typically what he does when we leave play dates. Today, this was our conversation, and it was just so sweet!!! It was just so like him to feel this way, and to express it as he did, it stole my heart. God I love him....
Brayden: Mommy, Im sorry.
Me: Why are you sorry baby, you didnt do anything you need to be sorry for, why are you saying you are sorry?
Brayden: Well, my feelings are hurt.
Me: Why are your feelings hurt baby?
Brayden: um, uh, well....Benjamin hurt my feelings when he pushed Miss Rosalie, and and um...she cried, and it hurt my feelings....
Me: It hurt your feelings when Rosalie was sad?
Brayden: Yeah, Rosalie cried and it hurt my feelings....but I make her happy, and I make Benjamin happy too!
Me: Awe....I think its very sweet that you felt bad for Miss Rosalie Bray, but Benjamin didnt mean to hurt her feelings, or your feelings...he is younger than you are baby.
Brayden: Benjamin tell Miss Rosalie Sorry....
Me: Yes, Benjamin did the right thing by saying he was sorry to her, that was very very nice of him, and Im glad that you tried really hard to make both of them happy afterwards too, that is a good big boy thing to do and Mommy is proud of you buddy!
Bray: I knowwww......thank you Mommy!
I drove silent for a moment taking all of that in. My mind was piecing together the events of the day, and his reactions, and our conversation. I thought....how sweet is it that he felt sadness observing Rosalie's hurt feelings, and also sadness for Benjamin becuase he knew Ben didnt want a time out, and that it hurt his feelings too. I was proud that Bray felt compelled to make them both happy again, and that he recognized that was the right thing to do. It was kind, it was genuine, and it was compassionate. It's one of those moments you realize that all of your reminding, nagging, correcting, and talking to your child DOES make sense to them, and they are in fact taking it all in within their little worlds. I'd like to think he will never lose that part of his personality, and that his first instinct will always be to attempt to make others feel better. Maybe I am doing this right afterall....right now at least anyways ;-)